Listening to this song, and i just realised how i feel recently. It has been five days, and i didnt even cry. I still carry on with my routine, hanging out with friends, online, watching drama series, eating, sleeping... I thought i didnt get affected by it,as this is the decision i made. When going around with friends, i am still me, laughing, doing some stupid stuffs, and i thought i enjoyed it. Many friends said i am too cool for it, doesnt look like what i am supposed to be. Well, i am wondering what should be my response??? EMO whole week, lock myself inside my room? OFF my phone and let nobody to find me?
I didnt even cry,i tried to but there is no tears coming out. I dunno how i feel.
SAD? NO!
DEPRESS? NO!
HAPPY?
Finally i came out with my feeling. EMPTY
yeah, i feel emptiness inside, i feel nothing else except empty...
its like my soul missing something...something that i handed it away myself,and it's a punishment for me now,after i have done this, after i have made the tough decision to give up.
i have been struggling, because i know once i let go it will never come back. BUT how can i be so selfish when i know i am not capable of carrying this responsibility and losing my faith at the same time.
I just wanna stop myself from hurting someone further, before it is far too late, and what i did is hurting her now. I hate myself for doing this, but i know this is the correct decision to make, and i will hate myself more if i dont have the courage to do that!
I pray to GOD that she will be alright very soon, i pray to HIM to take away her sadness and put it on me,i can handle it, as i am empty inside now. I hate emptiness, the feeling of lacking the very precious piece of my soul...
I feel nothing but emptiness....
I tell you. Time will cure. Your sadness, her sadness. If you feel that it's the best decision, don't regret. Indeed, it's hard to let go someone/something that's so important to you, but you'll learn something new from it. Pray to God, and He knows the best for you. :)
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